英語(yǔ)語(yǔ)句:用這些話來(lái)安慰人更好
1. Better – “This must be so hard for you.”
不如說(shuō):“我知道你肯定非常難受。”
Not so good – “God will never give you more than you can handle.”
不要說(shuō):“上帝不會(huì)讓你承受更多苦難。”
Even if the person has a faith system that includes God, this phrase has the tacit implication that if you can’t handle things, you must not have enough faith, you’re a bad Christian, etc.
如果這個(gè)人對(duì)上帝有著很堅(jiān)定的信仰,這句話就有了隱藏的含義:也就是說(shuō)如果你處理不好這件事,你肯定是沒(méi)有堅(jiān)定的信仰,不是虔誠(chéng)的.基督徒等等。
2. Better – “It’s hard to understand why these things happen.”
不如說(shuō):“真不知道為什么會(huì)發(fā)生這樣的事情!
Not so good – “I’m sure it’s all for the best.”
不要說(shuō):“我想這一切可能是最好的結(jié)果。”
Ack! Try really hard not to say this! Right now, the grieving person doesn’t see that anything is for the best except to have her loved one back.
我的天,千萬(wàn)別說(shuō)這句話!這個(gè)沉浸在悲痛中的人并不覺(jué)得一切是好結(jié)果,除非她的至親能夠復(fù)活。
3. Better – “I’m not sure what to say but I want you to know I’m here for you.”
不如說(shuō):“我不知道該說(shuō)些什么,你只要知道我一直都在你身邊!
Not so good – Saying nothing at all.
不要:什么都不說(shuō)。
This is actually one of the worst things that can happen to a grieving person: having people ignore his pain. If you’re not sure what to say, or are uncertain that the person wants to talk about it, it’s okay to say just that.
周?chē)娜撕鲆曀膫,這對(duì)傷痛的人來(lái)說(shuō)可能是最壞的事情之一了。如果你不知道去說(shuō)些什么,或者不確定他是否愿意聊這件事,那就直接說(shuō)出來(lái)吧。
4. Better – “You must miss him terribly.”
不如說(shuō):“你肯定十分想念他!
Not so good – “He’s in a better place” or “Just be happy he isn’t in pain anymore.”
不要說(shuō):“他去了更好的地方” 或 “開(kāi)心點(diǎn),他不再痛苦了。”
These things are always so well-intentioned, but ouch! The place the griever wants him to be is with her, no matter how much pain he was in or how difficult the caregiving was.
這些話的初衷的確是好的,但是悲痛者還是希望至親就在自己身邊,無(wú)論至親有著什么樣的痛苦或者無(wú)論照顧起來(lái)是多么的麻煩。
5. Better – “I can’t begin to understand how you feel”
不如說(shuō):“我沒(méi)法真正體會(huì)你現(xiàn)在的感受!
Not so good – “I know exactly how you feel.”
不要說(shuō):“我完全知道你的感受。”
This is very tempting to say, but be careful: Even if you have experienced a loss, each person has their own unique path to travel so you can’t know exactly how he feels.
我們總會(huì)說(shuō)這句話,但是記住,即使你也失去過(guò)親人,但每個(gè)人的生命旅途不一樣,所以你并不可能完全知道別人的感受。
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